A cross section of residents of the Federal Capital Territory (FCT) on Monday attributed parental failure in preparing the male children to engage in house choses as one of the factors leading to widespread failure of marriages.
The residents, in separate interviews with the News Agency of Nigeria (NAN) believe that parents only prepare their female children for marriage because of traditions, beliefs and personal mentality, hence, the lopsided preparation for the union.
It is believed that only female children undergo domestic trainings such as cooking, cleaning, laundry, baby sitting and similar chores under supervision of their mothers or other female adults.
Inemesit Emmanuel, a resident of Masaka, Nasarawa State, opined that it is because parents see their male children as future heads of families, therefore encouraging lack of adequate preparations in domestic chores.
According to her, no family in Africa prepares their male children for marriage, this is an age-long African culture that has been in existence.
”Some parents see their male children as semi-gods who are to be pampered.
”Some cultures believe that women should be the ones train on how to be responsible, while the men are to be sent to school so as to get better jobs,” she said.
She, however, said that preparing the male child for marriage is as important as preparing the female child, adding that the root problem in marriages is the lopsided training given to children.
Pascal Ibeawuchi, resident of Durumi 3, in his opinion said that supposed lack of preparation of male children for marriage is based on family values and upbringing.
Ibeawuchi said that it is difficult to give what you don’t have, therefore, parents could not imbibe what they don’t have in their children.
According to him, parents not trained on how to take responsibilities themselves cannot train their children to take responsibilities.
”A father who was not raised on how to help in domestic work, respect and value his wife cannot change or make the son a responsible man.
”There are families that are nonchalant on their male children’s behaviours because they believe that when they marry, their wives will take up the responsibilities,” he said.
Ibeawuchi urged parents to train their male children on how to be responsible as that would help reduce number of irresponsible men in the society.
Vanessa Haakyav, a resident of UTC said that why parents don’t prepare their male children for marriage was due to emotional imbalance of the woman and societal beliefs.
Haakyav said that the society believes that a woman manages the home in every family so every responsibility should be on them.
According to her, most married women are not happy due to too much responsibilities and workload on them.
She said that society believes that it is the responsibility of a female child to know how to take care of the kids and do other house chores.
Haakyav said that a woman who is emotionally imbalanced could not raise a responsible man because she won’t have time to check the behaviors of their male children .
“The reason why most parents don’t prepare their male children for marriage is because of the emotional imbalance of the woman and societal beliefs.
“Society believes that it is the responsibility of a female child to know how to cook, wash plates, do laundry while male children are trained on how to make money “she said.
Haakyav urged that parents should engage their male children in doing house chores as they do to their female children.
Chinyere Gana, a resident of Gaduwa and a civil servant, said that why most parents don’t prepare their male children for marriage was based on individual’s mentality and tradition.
Gana said that some parents believe that training a male child to be responsible in domestic work is not as important as training a female child.
According to her, most parents believe that a female child is the one who will take care of her kids and other responsibilities needed in the family.
She said that tradition also puts pressure on the female child because it’s believed that she won’t live with her parents when she is grown for marriage.
(NAN)
